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understreetlamps
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Name: jaimelee
Country: United States
State: Virginia
Birthday: 11/24/1985
Gender: Female
Interests: reenacting scenes from nuremburg. pretending to live in 1922. pretending to know how to play guitar. also. i like books.
Expertise: skanking. flying. turning invisible. deflecting bullets. also. living in my imagination. i really can skank, though.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Nonprofit
Message: message me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
5/25/2003
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| i keep fucking things up. left and right.
i'm getting depressed as hell again.
i can't understand when you speak to me like that
it's your own special language i think she knows
she holds everything over my head
she holds you over my head, and you let her
and you probably like it, you'll never let go
and she knows that, and she likes it
and there's nothing i can do but watch
i want to make everything better
but you won't tell me where it hurts
you won't tell me anything
you just change the subject
and say it's a "thing," that it'll go away soon
meanwhile we all sit around
and hope that you'll come by soon
praying that you'll say hi soon
and you just walk obliviously away
you have too much power
in our charade we titled "friendship"
everything you do makes me hurt
because when i said i loved you,
i fucking meant it. | | |
| once upon a time i cared
but i'm so over that now
you tried to convince me otherwise
but you're screwed too
and as we shut the fuck up
our bones rattle a song i've never heard | | |
| i love college.
i met a boy named andrew and by a twist of ...whatever, i ended up at his place saturday night. my room mate had her boyfriend over so i just stayed at andrew's.
then on sunday we decided to watch tv...until we fell asleep.
then on monday, he invited me to spend the night.
and tonight. i may just invite myself.
i just don't ever want to have to sleep alone again.
me: you can kick me out whenever, you know.
him: well then. if it's up to me, you'll still be here tomorrow
him: it's weird. usually i'll be a really big dick and sleep as far away from the girl as possible. practically smothering the wall. but with you, it's nice being so close and i don't want to let go. | | |
| so i leave friday morning. about 30 hours from now.
Things to do:
-register to vote
-call ty
-call abby (!)
-get haircut
-oh yeah and pack | | |
| the surgery went fine. they made me dress down to my undies and my bra and that stupid gown that's so big it doesn't matter if you tie it because your butt is sticking out no matter what.
and i didn't shave my legs, so when they kept giving me blankets i was happy. when they stabbed me with a couple of needles, i was not so happy. i still have a bright green/yellow/purple/blue contusion on my left hand. with a small, red dot in the center. it's so ugly...i want it forever.
and once the iv was in, they started letting people see me. and people were just in and out of my room. and somebody was crying next door.
then they walked with me to the FREEZING operating room where they gave me a nice, warm blanket. i laid down on the metal table and they said "you might start feeling a little sleepy" and i said "yes i --" and then i woke up in room 5 with my parents and some nurse telling me to take some meds. i couldn't feel my neck--it was awesome. suddenly i was home and on a couch where i lived up until now.
actually i still live on that stupid couch but my mom kicked me out because she was having an open house and people were going to be using that room. now my dad "called the tv" so i'm just hanging out in my mom's office. i think that my body is getting used to perkiset though, because it's not affecting me as much as it did. now i'm just in pain all the time. but i get that loopy head rush thing.
so gross: i keep coughing up surgery shrapnel. | | |
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